Statutory warning: Some parts of the following passage is going to be written, emulating what i call, Iyer-style-description. Those who are allergic to the above mentioned person's writings please skip those segments!
The trip had only one purpose. To reach the National Bureau for Soil Sciences(NBSS) and collect the soil data for the watershed that I am working on. I was completely sponsored by the project of Ministry of Water resources under my Guide. That was one respite as I took up this ordeal. I was supposed to leave by the 6.35 AM local. I have this particular thing w.r.t morning trains. I am so confident that I will miss them that I don't sleep the previous night. So i followed the same tradition and put a nite-out. I left at 6.05 AM. Did not find a cycle rickshaw in sight. Walked towards the gate to find this 'typical' boozed-out-english-speaking rickshaw-wallah. I quickly bullied him into accepting Rs.25 only to the station and set out. I had to regularly spur him to go faster as I didn't have time: "Dada thoda jaldi jaayeeye". Pat came the reply: "No worry, sir. We take IIT student many time. Aapke time train mein pahunch jaayenge". Aapke time train??? Hmmmmmmm. He somehow got me to the station at 6.30. Now the problem was he didn't have change for a 50. So i had to roam arnd get some change and pay him. All the time the thankless bugger would keep directing me to different places where I could get change.
Now the best part. The ticket counter. I rushed in the station like a madman, panting away to glory towards a counter barely gasping out the words "Howrah-gasp-ticket-gasp-gasp-express". All I was met with was a stoic expression and a droll reply "Tickets at counter 9". Thankfully counter 9 was empty but I had just heard some commotion from there a minute back. I reached there in a less-panting state and asked for the ticket. Now the Aunty-ji in the counter was chewing her paan with her eyebrows crunched up apparently because of some anger she had just shown towards somebody and her mouth letting out a rapid set of bengali-scold-words. I told her: "Madam, express ticket deejiye Howrah ke liye.". The scoldings did not stop. The announcement for the train started: "203 Down Midnapur-Howrah local is coming on platform No.6". I prodded her further: "Madam, train aa gaya hain, jaldi kariye"..... "madam jaldi!!! Ek howrah ke liye express ticket".Her eyes settled on me and she asked me in a tone which could be called more a bark than human speech: "Kaunsa express... kaise maang liya koi bhi express... aise kaise koi bhi express... naam bolo"....... "Madam, pleeaasseee... train aa raha hain!!!! ... " .... "203 Down Midnapur-Howrah local is coming on platform No.6" ...... "Madam!!!"..... "Yeh tho local hain ... isme mein express ka ticket nahin milega"....... I was DUMBFOUNDED. I am ready to pay Rs.44 instead of Rs.22 to get onto a local with a express ticket and here was this creature trying to stop me. My limited(rather self-permitted) vocabulary of gaalis offered its help. I refused the help and told her: "Theek hain local ka ticket deejiye"...... "Ab local ka ticket maang rahe ho..."..... she types in something.... "Aise kaam chalta hain kya ".....the printer started making whirring sounds..... "Tum tho IIT ka student ho itna tho pataa hona chahiye"...... The ticket at hand and wallet in another, I dash to the platform No. 6... A 'gentleman' tells me at my start point, that the train is at Platform 2. My confused and confounded mind decides to take me to Pf.2.......... run.... huff...puff... gasp gasp... I could hear my heart thumping like the beats in a trance song (complete with the whoooosshshhh effect). i reach Pf.2............ "203 Down Midnapur-Howrah local is coming on platform No.6" ..... AAAAArrrrggghhhhhhhh (pronunciation key in previous post)... huff ... puff.... more stairs... gaaaaassspppppp........ I am above platfrom 6 now... and .. and .... and... the train is sliding away... looking at it taking up speed rapidly... i gave up climbing down the stairs itself.... "DAAAAMMMNNNN!!!!!" ... it was pretty deep-throated.. enough to wake up the beggar who was sleeping beside my feet.....
"Should I kill the fat lady?"..... "Maybe I could go upto her and have a verbal combat"....."Maybe I could go and stand in front of her and make her realise that I missed my train" .... with every thought my enthusiasm for having my revenge waned..... Anyway... A sympathetic passer-by informed me that there was another local in 20 min..... I waited... boarded that train.... and was finally off for Cal!!...
Now that is a totally different story.........................................................
The trip had only one purpose. To reach the National Bureau for Soil Sciences(NBSS) and collect the soil data for the watershed that I am working on. I was completely sponsored by the project of Ministry of Water resources under my Guide. That was one respite as I took up this ordeal. I was supposed to leave by the 6.35 AM local. I have this particular thing w.r.t morning trains. I am so confident that I will miss them that I don't sleep the previous night. So i followed the same tradition and put a nite-out. I left at 6.05 AM. Did not find a cycle rickshaw in sight. Walked towards the gate to find this 'typical' boozed-out-english-speaking rickshaw-wallah. I quickly bullied him into accepting Rs.25 only to the station and set out. I had to regularly spur him to go faster as I didn't have time: "Dada thoda jaldi jaayeeye". Pat came the reply: "No worry, sir. We take IIT student many time. Aapke time train mein pahunch jaayenge". Aapke time train??? Hmmmmmmm. He somehow got me to the station at 6.30. Now the problem was he didn't have change for a 50. So i had to roam arnd get some change and pay him. All the time the thankless bugger would keep directing me to different places where I could get change.
Now the best part. The ticket counter. I rushed in the station like a madman, panting away to glory towards a counter barely gasping out the words "Howrah-gasp-ticket-gasp-gasp-express". All I was met with was a stoic expression and a droll reply "Tickets at counter 9". Thankfully counter 9 was empty but I had just heard some commotion from there a minute back. I reached there in a less-panting state and asked for the ticket. Now the Aunty-ji in the counter was chewing her paan with her eyebrows crunched up apparently because of some anger she had just shown towards somebody and her mouth letting out a rapid set of bengali-scold-words. I told her: "Madam, express ticket deejiye Howrah ke liye.". The scoldings did not stop. The announcement for the train started: "203 Down Midnapur-Howrah local is coming on platform No.6". I prodded her further: "Madam, train aa gaya hain, jaldi kariye"..... "madam jaldi!!! Ek howrah ke liye express ticket".Her eyes settled on me and she asked me in a tone which could be called more a bark than human speech: "Kaunsa express... kaise maang liya koi bhi express... aise kaise koi bhi express... naam bolo"....... "Madam, pleeaasseee... train aa raha hain!!!! ... " .... "203 Down Midnapur-Howrah local is coming on platform No.6" ...... "Madam!!!"..... "Yeh tho local hain ... isme mein express ka ticket nahin milega"....... I was DUMBFOUNDED. I am ready to pay Rs.44 instead of Rs.22 to get onto a local with a express ticket and here was this creature trying to stop me. My limited(rather self-permitted) vocabulary of gaalis offered its help. I refused the help and told her: "Theek hain local ka ticket deejiye"...... "Ab local ka ticket maang rahe ho..."..... she types in something.... "Aise kaam chalta hain kya ".....the printer started making whirring sounds..... "Tum tho IIT ka student ho itna tho pataa hona chahiye"...... The ticket at hand and wallet in another, I dash to the platform No. 6... A 'gentleman' tells me at my start point, that the train is at Platform 2. My confused and confounded mind decides to take me to Pf.2.......... run.... huff...puff... gasp gasp... I could hear my heart thumping like the beats in a trance song (complete with the whoooosshshhh effect). i reach Pf.2............ "203 Down Midnapur-Howrah local is coming on platform No.6" ..... AAAAArrrrggghhhhhhhh (pronunciation key in previous post)... huff ... puff.... more stairs... gaaaaassspppppp........ I am above platfrom 6 now... and .. and .... and... the train is sliding away... looking at it taking up speed rapidly... i gave up climbing down the stairs itself.... "DAAAAMMMNNNN!!!!!" ... it was pretty deep-throated.. enough to wake up the beggar who was sleeping beside my feet.....
"Should I kill the fat lady?"..... "Maybe I could go upto her and have a verbal combat"....."Maybe I could go and stand in front of her and make her realise that I missed my train" .... with every thought my enthusiasm for having my revenge waned..... Anyway... A sympathetic passer-by informed me that there was another local in 20 min..... I waited... boarded that train.... and was finally off for Cal!!...
Now that is a totally different story.........................................................
No comments:
Post a Comment