Kar lo duniya mutthi mei...

Circa 2001, July 14th:

“Hello? Who is this?” …”Sudershan? Dei, Lakshmi chithi here!!” …”Chithi!!!!!! Hi!!! How are u??”… “I am fine. Where is amma? I want to wish her”…”One sec…”…

“AMMMA!!!! CHITHI IS CALLING FROM CHICAGO!!! FAST!!! I AM HOLDING THE PHONE! FASSSTT!!!!”…

“SUDU!! JUST DON’T HOLD THE PHONE!! TALK TO HER! DON’T WASTE THE CALL!!”

“YAYA…So how is everybody??? When are you coming to India next??? I am… Ahh amma’s here”

“LAKSHMI!! HOW ARE U??” …

“MYTHILI????? HAPPY 25th ANNIVERSARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”……

Just about 4 years back, a call from the US was equivalent to the Indian team making a clean series sweep, Rare. An occasion worth remembrance. Due to this wonderful tam-brahm (or is it?) habit of keeping the volume exponentially proportional to the distance of the caller(or receiver). Neighbours would know one got a call from abroad: “Aaj US se mere sister ne call kiya” …. “haan ji pataa hai. Humne suna”. A whirlwind affair, such call(s) would uproot us from whatever activity we were engaged in and within 5 minutes the call would be over and the whole family would be around the phone. Amma with her hands white with the atta she was kneading. Appa wearing his reading glasses with his office papers in hand. Hema Didi also with her hands white as she was preparing the roti. And of course, your truly had answered the phone (jobless as always).

Circa 2005 September, 5 nights a week

T-r-i-n-g T-r-i-n-g…Gtalk: Call from Amma ( Answer/Ignore… ”Hello? Can u hear me?”…“Ya sudu, we can hear u. Can u?”…”Ya ma, I can. So wassup?” … “…”Nothing specific da. Ananya rolled over today. Hema has taken snaps, we’ll send them soon”… “Sure send them on gmail”…”How are your exams going?” … “3 down, 1 to go on Thursday. Will study later” ... “Appram…” …”nothing else…”

That would be my mother calling from my sister’s place in Florida. She takes care of my niece till didi returned from office. And Appa would call me asking with regard to some financials which have to be taken care off. Often I have spent 40 minutes just trying to listen to my niece’s voice. These calls rarely have content and are just made just so that we can hear each other’s voice. Note the calm conversation in the latter compared to the screaming and bellowing in the former. And I must say the quality of GTalk is far better than direct telephone calls itself.

This is on the international front. On the national front, one man’s dream has literally revamped the telecom industry in the country. Reliance IndiaPhone has revolutionized… well, BF-GF relationships. After both parties buy a reliance phone (a down investment of around 2k-3k each), at Rs.770 per month there is INFINITE talktime. A dear wingies of mine is sharing this phone with another hallmate of mine. So every night, C-123 is seen on the cricket ground in front of the wing, mumbling sweet nothings into his phone… for hours together. This has revolutionized youth relationships in the country. Earlier when fielded the question “Aur, how serious is it getting?”, the reply would be “Quite serious yaar, I call her once in a while”. Now: “Nothing much yaar, Bought a reliance IndiaPhone” and pat comes the reply “Oh that serious eh? Good for you man!”.


The greatly acclaimed telecom revolution both in India and the US in regard to Mobile telephony and Internet telephony, respectively; has changed the way relationships are made, kept and at time, broken. Mothers don’t think so much about sending their daughters to the foreign lands, as they can keep in touch so regularly. Long-distance relationships are the norm of the day. One meeting and a spark flies. So what if she lives across the country, Reliance hai na! Gone are the days when Romeos would have to dodge in the darkness & climb the balcony just to see her face in the moonlit night and hear her voice. Love’s on speed-dial. So is family. So many fathers keep in touch with their kids and spouse over the phone while their touring the world more than the mythological parashuram or odysseus.

So many of these gadgets and technologies which ostensibly are ‘bringing the world together’ and are ‘reaching out to hearts’ are doing more harm than good. There is no replacement for being in the vicinity of a loved one. At this point the pragmatic would disagree with me, saying that it’s not possible ‘these’ days for professionals to be around their loved ones all the time. That the work culture is such that, Dad’s who come in the night to find their kids sleeping and kiss them goodbye in the morning when they leave for work before they wake up, are becoming very common.

Look at Japan. The land of the rising sun too had similar family values compared to India. But the social structure there is abysmal now. In the mindless rush to recover from their inglorious war defeat, the 60s-70s worked their asses off. They indoctrinated their children with the same values and principles that they got from their parents, but they didn’t show them how to adapt those values in the modern sense. The result is the highly dysfunctional families in the country. And sadly, we are heading in the same way, albeit slowly. We have parents who are professionals and stalwarts of their respective fields but, they still want their child answer this question: Engineer or Doctor? There definitely is no panacea for such a plethora of problems, but can't we try? Or will it be too late for our generation? Caught with our pants down in the glare of global limelight?

I hope the Indian family system is stronger and infallible in view of Verizon’s $14.95 monthly calling rates.